Nerves...

I love to travel, but the trip tomorrow has be a bit nervous. I'm totally unprepared for our trip to Nashville. I haven't started packing and am in fact still doing laundry. NOT how I wanted to feel the day before we leave. This past week and weekend has been a bit crazy with Christmas, and my folks coming in yesterday, then spending all day today out at my mother in laws. Not that I haven't had fun, but I've poorly managed my time and will pay heavily tomorrow. I just hope I don't forget anything. Oh well if I do we are in a BIG city! Till the next yr. Ta Ta...

Christmas Spirit...

This year I am having the hardest time getting in the Christmas spirit. I have purchased the gifts, and wrapped most of them. But I just don't feel like celebrating Christmas this year.

I feel similar to how I felt in 2004 and 2005. The tree is up, and lit, but w/o any decorations on it. That's as much decorating as I'm going to do this year. I'm sure looking back on photos, I'll regret it, but right now, I don't care. The kids are happy, and Bob is happy with it, so I'm not going to beat myself up over it. Merry Christmas!!

Normal?

I'm home with two little boys. They are in the back bed room screaming at each other and laughing. Is this normal?

Sat. Dec. 5th. Bob sr. took our family and Christies family to Columbus for a play. I was a bit nervous because once you go to big boy undies there's no going back to pull ups for ANYTHING!!! Mike did great! No accidents at all. (Of course I had two extra sets of clothing on hand for him just in case.) Both boys sat for almost two hours and watched a Christmas performance that was amazing!! In many ways the performance reminded me of my fav. years of my child hood. It also reaffirmed in me my desire to get to know God again. While walking in the hall way, Mike made friends with two different little girls. One who was deft, and one who was in the performance as a dancer. Both had fun playing with him. And he had fun flirting with them :) He is definitely part Keyser!

After the performance, and dinner with the family, Bob and I took the boys to a CP Parents support group Christmas party in Columbus. It was really cool to meet so many different family's from different backgrounds that have all been united by the devastation that is CP. The two families I really talked with had twins, but because of complications with the pregnancy had to deliver early, both lost one of the twins. They spent a lot more time at Children's than we did. I was able to talk with them about doctors, therapy's, procedures, and insurance, they not only understood, they where able to help. I've asked that the parents who have had SDR's done on their children contact me. There are two in the group!!! I'm so relieved and happy to find a community that understands my son, and accepts him without bias!!! Now if it was only closer to home :(

(Once again, I was reminded of how much easier life would be if we lived near a BIG city!!!)

Sunday the 6th, Bob and I dedicated the day to staying home! We played with the kids, and after we laid them down for the night, I lit the tree, and Bob set it up. There are 200 bulbs per section on the tree and 11 sections for the tree so there are over 1000 bulbs lighting up our Christmas tree this year. I think that I'm not going to put any decorations on the tree at all, just the lights and the topper! It's so pretty! Finally the Christmas spirit is upon me! (Now it's snowing!!! Could it get any better?) Daily, I watch my sons grow! Mike didn't have any accidents at all on this day! None!!! He was playing on the floor in the living room and asked me for help, actually asked. "Mommy 'elp." Then when I had helped him with the train track, he said " 'hank you". His first "Thank you". It was AMAZING!!! Greg went to the grocery store with me, and he pushed his shopping cart around and put groceries in it. We went to Powell's here in town, and they have kid carts. He loves it.

Monday the 7th. is just beginning , but I think it's going to be a great day.

Thea

What do you get when you mix PMS and GPS?

I love Maxine…

What do you get when you mix PMS with a GPS?


A crazy bitch who will find you!!!!!!

As the yr. comes to an end...

2009 will prove to be an interesting year. Full of ups and downs, of that I have no doubt. Jan. 1, 2009

As the year is coming to an end, I've spent some time this evening looking over the past yrs. blogs It's made me smile, laugh out loud, and cry more than I would have liked.

Smile to see where my boys, husband and I have come from in so many ways.

Laugh out loud to remeber some of the things my children have said and done through out the year. (IE: Penis BIG- Greg/ 2009) I wish I had written more of it down. There are little things you think you'll remember but then life gets busy and you forget.

Cry, because I saw just how low I had gotten. Wow, I can't believe there was actually a time when I was so frustrated that I was seriously thinking of leaving my husband. Thank you Tammie for stepping in, and calling him. I know it was difficult, but I can't tell you how much I appreciate you stepping out of your comfort zone for me. I can't believe how stressed out I have been this year. I know it's true, I wrote it down so I wouldn't forget... But looking back at it, it's been a rough year. I can't believe how far I've fallen, and who's been there to help me back up. Not the people I would have expected at this time last yr. I don't remember making new friends, it seems like I've know them for years. I don't remember loosing old friends, it seems like they've been gone forever, or where never really there to begin with.

As I get older, I realize just how little I really understand. I realize that, in that, I'm not alone. I'm a hard person to understand. Thank you to all who actually take the time to get to know me, and understand what I say and how I mean it. (Usually, the two don't seem to go hand in hand!)

On Jan. 3rd. I asked for prayer. I said my life was out of balance. Well, it still is and looking back over this past yrs. blogs, I haven't done ANYTHING to change that. In fact, I've just gotten madder and madder at God. What has it gotten me? A more bitter heart is all. I'm tired of being bitter. I'm tired of fighting, but I'm scared shit less, to fall into Gods arms. If I want the joy I've lost, I realize that's my only choice. But saying it and doing it are two different things.

Avarage of one a day....

Day 5 with big boy undies and so far he's averaged an accident a day. Sat. none, Sunday two, Monday one (at the post office), Tues. none, Wend. two at school. So we are getting there. The up side is that he LOVES his big boy undies and wears them all day, except nap time.

Now if we could just get Greg interested....