Two things in life....

"Two things in life are certain, taxes and death."
-I have no idea who said this, and don't want to look it up right now.

So the question is what happens to our kids say we kick the bucket before they are 18? I went to a future planning for children with special needs seminar this past weekend and it was VERY informative, and a real eye opener. Every parent, regardless if you have a special needs child or not, should have your affairs in order. Arrangements made with a funeral director, a will, a general durable power of attorny, a medical durable power of attorny, a living will (different than a regular will), and a letter of intent. (and all of it should be updated every 5 years at the most.)

For me these questions are what keep me up at night.

Who will get my boys should Bob and I pass?
I have a number of people in mind, but Mike has a medical condition that requires a lot of doctors apts. and only one person has ever even asked how Mikes braces go on. He will always have CP and the family who we trust our kids with will have to deal with that for the rest of his and their lives. (That's a big thing to deal with.)

How will my boys be raised?
Things happen and a two parent family isn't always possable, but I want my boys to have both a mom and a dad, if Bob and I should bite the big one. I'm not putting down divorcies or the like, but boys need a father. (As they get older, they need their father more and their mother less.) Our boys are strong willed and need a family who can deal with them.

Other kids in the house?
Other kids are not a necisity, but if they are there how do they and our boys get along? Are they a lot older than our two or not? How are they treated? Would they be ok with the addition of two brothers? How do they relate to each other and their parents? (Respectful? Rude? Polite? Scared?)

Religion?
This may be petty for some, but for me it is important. I want my boys to be brought up in a household that is God fearing, and attends church on a regular basis. I want to know that my boys are being cared for in a Godly home.

Who will be the primary care giver?
Again, petty for some, but not for me. I want a family who is dedicated to the family as a unit. Not two parents and a gagal of kids all going in different directions all the time. Everyone (even Bob and I) take a break from the kids and go out without them, but I don't want them raised by a nanny.

And last but not least....
Although the grandparents would be good at this, they have already raised their kids. It's their turn to be the grandparents. I would however make sure that whoever we leave our kids with understands that the grandparents are allowed to visit (when convienent) and as often as possable. Grandparents have a special roll in a childs life and vise versa, and I wouldn't want to take that from either Mike or Greg or any of our parents.

So there you have it. The questions I ask myself, the things that keep me up, or wake me up in the middle of the night.
The reason I take my Saturday and go to things like that, knowledge is power. And in this regard I want all the power I can have because in the end I'll have no say. I'll be gone, and I need to make sure while I can that my kids are taken care of.

So what about you? Have you thought about this? What are you doing to make sure your kids are taken care of?